The end of a marriage is a major life event that can send ripples through every part of a person’s life, from health to work to relationships with children, relatives and friends. The often acrimonious nature of a divorce can make someone feel as if the end of a marriage is the end of life.
Divorcing couples everywhere, including Illinois, should know that divorce is not a dead end, only the end of one chapter in life. This can be considered a rare opportunity to refocus one’s life and start over again, a little wiser and perhaps a bit stronger. As with all other major life events, though, effort is required. The process starts by not denying grief, but not wallowing in it, either. One can move forward and still acknowledge all that was lost. Becoming attuned to emotions, especially those that had previously been kept inside, will go a long way toward recovering from an ordeal as emotional as divorce.
The next step is acceptance. It’s important to recognize that life has changed and will continue to change, and may do so dramatically. Focus on what is left rather than what was lost. Acceptance dissipates resentment and anger, which are by-products of divorce if emotions are not effectively managed.
Next, set goals in life. Make a list of goals ranging in theme from career to family. Include personal passions and dreams. This is a chance to get in touch with one’s self, to become reacquainted with things that can truly lead to happiness.
Each step fuels the healing process and opens new avenues in life to explore. Remember, there is no timetable for anyone to move forward. It can take months, even years to finally let go of the pain involved in the end of a marriage. Life can be challenging. For divorcing couples in Illinois, divorce may seem to be a turbulent and raging river but it is one that can be crossed. Illinois family lawyers are experienced in navigating the emotional waters of divorce and can offer guidance on how to calmly start a new chapter of life.
Source: Huffington Post, “Divorce: Not just an end – but a beginning, too,” DD Richards, Jan. 31, 2014