A major issue in a divorce is the matter of communication between spouses. This is especially problematic if the divorce has been acrimonious, and if there are disputes over child custody, property division and child support or alimony payments. However, a recent article recommended three different options for handling communication between spouses in a divorce regarding a variety of important matters. The first recommendation is for one spouse to be pleasant to the other in an attempt to change the situation. This option is recommended as a way to get a positive response from the other spouse and to improve the relationship between the divorced spouses.
The second recommendation is for the spouses to retreat from communicating for a period of time and to let any hard feelings cool down. In this approach, the spouses would only communicate with each other through their attorneys. This option has the drawback of forcing the spouses to communicate about important subjects such as visitation and schooling issues. Generally, spouses in a bitter divorce situation may want to break off communicating with each other and allow time for wounds to heal.
The last option is to accept the situation as it is, and for the spouses to focus on their own individual lives. This allows spouses to let bad behavior and rudeness from the other spouse slide off their back, because it will give them a better peace of mind and will not hurt any children involved. This option is considered to be the hardest, but relationship experts argue that it is the best long-term option because ignoring the other spouse’s nastiness will get easier over time.
A divorce is never easy for either spouse. However, spouses have many options available to avoid the nasty, bitter emotional battles that often accompany a contentious divorce. They have the option to work out a schedule for alimony or child support payments, a child visitation and custody schedule and an equitable property division. While doing so may be difficult, it can help make the situation less painful for all involved.
Source: The Huffington Post, “3 Ways to communicate better with your ex,” Honoree Corder, Aug. 2, 2013